I have heard rumors all my life, repeated by strange specters throughout my schooling, of a place where the books are free and the women are cheap…. A place where everything that is known, can be known if you just know how to look.
The truth is something else entirely.
Now, the books aren’t free in the sense that they can be taken forever, and the women aren’t cheap in the sense that they will have sex for you for very little money. It’s more along the lines that you can borrow a book for free, and the people involved in this genius profit scheme make very little money and thus live a frugal lifestyle.
In either case, I have found this place, and it is called “The Library.” Today, I got my official “Library Card” which is what I understand they give to intrepid explorers, such as myself, to take back to a room full of British thrill seekers so we can place it on the wall next to the elephant tusks.
Anyway, now that I have ventured to this magical kingdom, and fought its weather beaten hobos, senile old people, and frigid sex-hating librarians: I have a request.
So, my readers and my friends, any good books you’d like to recommend?
