Dunce Upon A Time

Update: It’s been brought to my attention (by the half-dozen people who e-mailed me under the impression that I was about to kill myself among others) that this may seem a bit darker than I had intended. Thank you all for your concern. While I can’t describe myself as exactly happy, I’d like to assure …

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PIZZA, CHARITY, PRIME MOVERS Way back in college I used to eat Red Baron Supreme Oven-Bake Pizzas for pretty much every meal. Why? Because I could get 4 for $5 and I was very very lazy and didn’t like to make elaborate dinners. Mostly because if I did make an elaborate dinner I’d end up …

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Peter Anderson I’ve been thinking about faking my own death, lately. Actually, I don’t know why I clarified that it was my own death. No one ever tries to fake someone else’s death, do they? Has that ever happened, even once? I don’t think it has. It all started when I saw a homeless man …

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When I first invented the Shaen’Woa (the mind-controlling demon monsters from the Tide World), which if I’m recalling correctly was sometime in the fifth grade, I thought “Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all the things people do that make my life horrible would condemn them to a horrible, awful death?” Then, with my evil childish …

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After I realized I just needed to use whatever artwork Erin had laying around for ebook covers, I decided I’d need to write a story called “The Glass Tongue.” So I walked around and I thought and I thought and I thought. I decided I wanted to write a story that was essentially “Cinderella in …

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I had an epiphany last night that I suck. Really, really suck. “Run, Run Judy” was the last story I wrote and finished that I actually liked. That was several months ago, and I felt it could have ended better than it did. That was an awful realization. So, I stared at the ceiling for …

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Graham found the laundromat of the hotel in a utility closet in the back of the ballroom. Or rather what used to be the ballroom, back in some long ago heyday when the Longstreet had been able to afford the upkeep. As far as Graham could see, which was only about four or five feet …

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… because the odds of two gay lion-taming German magicians with a love of flamboyant fashion being born in the same century, let alone within five years of each other, are sufficiently insurmountable for there to be any other rational explanation. A positive thought for your Tuesday. Bookmark on Delicious Digg this post Recommend on …

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First, I want to talk to you about the physiological reaction to smelling farts and then I want to make some book recommendations. The thing of it is, you can’t really force someone to smell a fart, can you? Oh, you can fart in an enclosed space, you can fart under some blankets, or (if …

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First, in case anyone was in suspense, the Awful Russian Literature Scenario I was worried about in my last post has been averted. As we were leaving Arizona my mother had a mammogram that detected a 15cc mass. This coincided with her not having insurance anymore. To make a long story short (and to skip …

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